As Mentor Mom of a MOPS group at my church, I have been rolling this year’s theme around in my mind for several months. It does not take a rocket science to convince a new Mom that becoming a Mom changes everything!
My son was born on August 19th and by about August 30th I was very much aware that life as I knew it had changed—I had been transported to another planet. This planet was not so orderly—laundry piled up everywhere. It had new smells—mostly spit up and dirty diapers. It required me to participate in previously unheard of activities like hooking a vacuum creating contraption to my breast and never moving without stopping to strap something on or grab the handle of a carrier that was as heavy as a space capsule! It didn’t take me long to realize that you don’t wear normal clothes on this planet either…normal seemed a long way away.
It was a planet where you become very familiar with the look and sounds of the middle of the night. You don’t sleep much on Planet Mom and that affects your thinking so much that they have named the condition “Momnesiaâ€. There were days when I couldn’t remember if I had brushed my teeth or not—the truth was I didn’t have the energy to care!
When my son was 3 weeks old, dear friends who had no children yet said, “Let’s go out to eat!†We hadn’t been in our favorite restaurant very long when to my surprise, I found myself stuck in a stall in the bathroom. There I struggled to get undressed and in a cold, nervous sweat sought to nurse this child who was determined to scream uncontrollably. In that alien moment, I remember looking up at the ceiling and thinking, “Toto, we’re not in Kansas anymore!â€
Our lives are so different on Planet Mom. I liked my old planet. It was quiet. I knew what to expect. I felt competent– went out with my husband frequently. I even had friends. But now, ugh.
Isn’t that what life seems like as a mom of preschoolers? The life we knew before we had children no longer exists. Things have changed. All of our relationships have changed, relationships with our spouse, our friends and maybe even with our children when another child comes along.
All of this change was made more difficult by the fact that this child that had come into my home looked to insecure, overwhelmed, exhausted me to be his guide to the galaxy!
As I think back, I believe that God brought me to the end of myself when he blessed me with a child. Another way to say that is to say, God was pursuing a relationship with me and the gift of my child was the “tool†He used to get me to think about Him. Motherhood humbled me and my self confidence evaporated and pressed me to look around to see if there was anyone up to this new task of being a child’s 24/7 care giver. The Lord let me know that “where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.†(Matthew 18:20)
Because the Lord is not bodily present it is easy to forget about Him—our thoughts of Him are often more like the forgotten tube sock that has fallen between the dryer and the washer than a conscious inclusion of Him in the everyday routine of living.
Here are some practical ideas that might help you gather in His name as you mother your child:
- Say “no†to one thing next week and fill the created space with God. Read Proverbs or Psalms or 1 chapter of Scripture and make your mind think on those words all day long.
- Every time you think of Him interact with Him. Talk out loud to the Lord—people will just think the sleep deprivation is getting to you.
- Let the living parable of mothering teach you more about God. Think often of how much you learn about the way we are to relate to God by thinking how dependent your child is on you.
- When you feel overwhelmed and frustrated, thank God that He is using your child’s neediness to expose your selfish heart and repent and receive new grace for the day.
- Thank God that He has given you something greater than self actualization to live for.
What is in your heart will flow out into your parenting. The best way to improve your parenting is to draw near to God. While your child looks to you to be his/her guide to the galaxy, you have a Lord who has promised to be yours!
 “They went after false idols and became false, and they followed the nations that were around them, concerning whom the Lord had commanded them that they should not do like them.†2 Kings 17:15“An idol is not simply a statue of wood, stone or metal; it is anything we love and pursue in place of God, and can also be referred to as a ‘false god’ or a ‘functional god.’ In biblical terms, an idol is something other than God that we set our hearts on, that motivates us, that masters or rules us, or that we serve.â€Â Luke 12:29, 1 Corinthians 10:6, 1 Corinthians 4:5, Ps. 119:133, Matt. 6:24
